Pointing at the crazies...

In restaurants we argue
over which of us will pay for your funeral

though the real question is
whether or not I will make you immortal.

At the moment only I
can do it and so

I raise the magic fork
over the plate of beef fried rice

and plunge it into your heart.
There is a faint pop, a sizzle

and through your own split head
you rise up glowing;

the ceiling opens
a voice sings Love Is A Many

Splendoured Thing
you hang suspended above the city

in blue tights and a red cape,
your eyes flashing in unison.

The other diners regard you
some with awe, some only with boredom:

they cannot decide if you are a new weapon
or only a new advertisement.

As for me, I continue eating;
I liked you better the way you were,
but you were always ambitious.
(They Eat Out, Atwood)

I WILL NOT EAT GREEN EGGS & HAM!

Hum, just got back home.
Last night was funny.
We were all freaked out.
*Muahahahahahahaa...!!!*
Nobody wanted to stay in Iza's haunted house anymore.
So off to see the little old man, it was.
"MAN"
He had it on eight thousand little yellow post-its all around his "office"
I laughed so hard, I cried.
Different fonts.
Different sizes.
Why?!?
I didn't ask.
But I'm curious.

I don't remember the name of the first movie. But it SUCKED!!! It was about a guy who killed his wife and was living with the guilt...I think! The best part ..or the only GOOD part..was when he found a finger in his house and it started to walk lol...I wouldn't reccomend it at all. Then again, I don't know the title.

Right now, I am making tomato soup. It's 11 am. I don't really *know* how to make it "properly"...I just always throw a bunch of shit into the pot, add tomatoes and call it tomato soup. It tastes good though, every time! Well, except the time I made it with ketchup...

Anna Nicole is such a dumbass.

I can't wait until tomorrow! I'll have to wake up pretty early tho :/


Found this poem. Love it!:

I do not love you except because I love you;
I go from loving to not loving you,
From waiting to not waiting for you
My heart moves from cold to fire.

I love you only because it's you the one I love;
I hate you deeply, and hating you
Bend to you, and the measure of my changing love for you
Is that I do not see you but love you blindly.
(Pablo Neruda)

It's kinda cheesy, typical poetry stuff...not original in the least, but I like it.

Last night, I lost my lip gloss for a while.
I thought I would go crazy.
But all turned out okay.
I had another one.

To shop or not to shop? There are a few things I need to get, but I'm afraid to go cause each time, I end up buying EVERYTHING but the one thing I meant to get initially.

I ran into Adam for a few minutes. Well, by "ran into", I mean that I found him on my doorstep. He came to wish me a belated Happy Birthday. I hit him with a strawberry. It was the best of times.

And, just for the record, I DON'T think that that Hannibal guy is hot!!

In hockey, you get three chances to catch up if you're losing a game. And if you manage to do that, you still get an Overtime period in which you can win.

But this isn't hockey.

I don't think either of us has won.

Though maybe it was a game.

Though one of us cheated.

PEBBLES IS LOOKIN' AT ME...

Hm, just came back from Wonderland. Got a season's pass. It's printed upside-down.

Went with Iza, Kiwi, and Kristyna.

I'm so tired. It was so hot. The line-ups were long, but the hot guys were plenty :) Though, I probably shouldn't be looking...

I got a Sponge Bob keychain and I went to see the Sponge Bob 3D movie!! It was the best part of the trip...THOUGH some of the ring toss games and squirty water games give out HUGE Sponge Bob plush things. I want one soooooooo much!!!!

"I swear, I'll make out with whoever wins one for me!!"

One fish.
Two fish.
Red fish.
Blue fish.

Dr. Seuss is a little bit racist bastard, no? What about the yellow fish? The black fish? Tsk tsk tsk.

*yawns* It seems as though I'm hanging out with Justin again tonight. Just in time, he got his car cleaned up.

I saw the COOLEST keychain today (well, besides one with a hige Sponge Bob on it, of course!). It said:

"Hear no evil.
Speak no evil.
Date no evil"

It was so perfect for me, but I don't like wordy keychains so I didn't get it. It was $2.99.

I'll spend all of the day tomorrow by the water somewhere, tanning and swimming. Well, at least TRYING to tan since I always end up lobster red, and TRYING to swim since..I don't swim lol. But, you get the drift.

That's another phobia I have: drowning.

Along with planes, heights, and basements.

I should go eat some tacos now and call J.

SKIM BANG SKA-DOODLE!

Hah...okay, while I'm waiting for *somebody* who is *late* to come pick me up for Wonderland, I thought I would write in a quick entry. It's funny how often I sign this thing...it's like a journal of all the retarded shit that comes in and ouf of my mind...actually, it's pretty amusing to read back sometimes.

So I'm listening to Seven NAtion Army by the White Stripes. It's pretty good...one of the very few songs I've dowloaded onto this computer since I'm a lazy beast. And, yes, I will come out and say it: I have ONE disco polo song on there too. Bialy Mis. It just reminds me of stuff, okay? I am perfectly sane.

Went out with Justin last night to play some mini golf and eat. I won the game, but that's not a huge achievement considering that I cheated. A lot. Still, I'd like to take this opportunity to rub it in J's face. YOU PUT LIKE A GIRL!!!!! hahahahaaa.... :)

Where oh where do I send this stupid paper work to? I must make calls.

I think its gonna rain today...which is alright with me as long as it happens later on in the evening and not anytime tomorrow, Monday, or Tuesday. I'm looking forward to Bronte and the fireworks and hanging out with all the broads lol...DOn't worry guys, I got a new bathing suit. Sadly, it's an extra small ..lol. But, hopefuly, no Wasaga reruns from last year *hides head in sand*

You're sad because you're sad.
It's psychic. It's the age. It's chemical.
Go see a shrink or take a pill,
or hug your sadness like an eyeless doll
you need to sleep.

Well, all children are sad
but some get over it.
Count your blessings. Better than that,
buy a hat. Buy a coat or pet.
Take up dancing to forget.

It;s an Atwood poem. It's a lot longer, but I only like this part. Is it just me, or is that chick fucking awesome? I dunno, I like her writing...so bitter and anti-male.

Did I mention that sunscreen smells so nice??? Mmmmmhmmmmm.

Ok. Phone. Check. LIpgloss. Check. Money. Check. I'm out.

SKIM BANG SKA-DOODLE!

Hah...okay, while I'm waiting for *somebody* who is *late* to come pick me up for Wonderland, I thought I would write in a quick entry. It's funny how often I sign this thing...it's like a journal of all the retarded shit that comes in and ouf of my mind...actually, it's pretty amusing to read back sometimes.

So I'm listening to Seven NAtion Army by the White Stripes. It's pretty good...one of the very few songs I've dowloaded onto this computer since I'm a lazy beast. And, yes, I will come out and say it: I have ONE disco polo song on there too. Bialy Mis. It just reminds me of stuff, okay? I am perfectly sane.

Went out with Justin last night to play some mini golf and eat. I won the game, but that's not a huge achievement considering that I cheated. A lot. Still, I'd like to take this opportunity to rub it in J's face. YOU PUT LIKE A GIRL!!!!! hahahahaaa.... :)

Where oh where do I send this stupid paper work to? I must make calls.

I think its gonna rain today...which is alright with me as long as it happens later on in the evening and not anytime tomorrow, Monday, or Tuesday. I'm looking forward to Bronte and the fireworks and hanging out with all the broads lol...DOn't worry guys, I got a new bathing suit. Sadly, it's an extra small ..lol. But, hopefuly, no Wasaga reruns from last year *hides head in sand*

You're sad because you're sad.
It's psychic. It's the age. It's chemical.
Go see a shrink or take a pill,
or hug your sadness like an eyeless doll
you need to sleep.

Well, all children are sad
but some get over it.
Count your blessings. Better than that,
buy a hat. Buy a coat or pet.
Take up dancing to forget.

It;s an Atwood poem. It's a lot longer, but I only like this part. Is it just me, or is that chick fucking awesome? I dunno, I like her writing...so bitter and anti-male.

Did I mention that sunscreen smells so nice??? Mmmmmhmmmmm.

Ok. Phone. Check. LIpgloss. Check. Money. Check. I'm out.

MR. ALI HAS TO GO PEE...

So I just went strawberry picking. Yep, it's official, I'm a dirty picker *hangs head in shame* It was pretty good though and the berries are soooo yummy and fresh and juicy and mmm...are you getting hungry yet? The weather was kinda...tricky...cause one minute u think u will boil and the next, you're frozen food.

They've got this blind man there that drives a little tractor-like thing and takes you from the strawberry place to the front of the...field? To me, it looked like one of those World War II movies where people get shipped off to concentration camp. All the way there, I kept telling Iza not to go in the showers.

I got a bunch of em for $5.30! That's pretty sweet.

If you want to know where the place is, I can't tell you street names or anything, but I can tell you in my own way:

1. leave my street and turn left.
2. drive for a while until there are no more bus stops
3. you should see a house with a crucifix at the top (heh)
4. then you turn somewhere
5. you should see, on your left hand side, a little bench. if you see an old man with a 2X4 (Ali!!) sitting on the bench with his legs crossed, smile, wave, and make a left turn
6. you should pass a golf ball on top of a big building
7. you will also pass what looks like a prison. if there are a lot of guys in orange vests digging stuff around it, you're in the right place
8. you will pass what is soon to be the new Polish church
9. and, finally, you'll see a cop car by the strawberry place pulling over a large van.
10. congrats!! you've made it!!

...heh...I should write directions for a living.

But, seriously, Ali is great!!!!! I can only imagine what he had that 2x4 with him for:

(a) It's his pet and he's taking it out for a nice walk.
(b) He told someone to "meet him outside" and is waiting behind the bushes with a 2x4 to pounce.
(c) He's volunteering some help with the building of the Polish church because it will be build out of scratch, from public donations.

Ah, good ol' Ali.

Last night was one of the longest, worst nights of my life.

This weekend's looking pretty good. I made plans for all days except Monday, and I'm not working until Wednesday!! :)

I ate sausage again. The kind with the cheese inside...mmmhmm...sausage. I'm so Polish.

Here's something I found online. SOme may find it offensive, but oh well:

The New Testament according to Dr. Seuss

One day God said, "This is what I will do:
I'll send down my son. I'll send him to you
To clear up this humpity bumpity hullaballoo.
His name will be Christ and he'll never wear shoes.
His pals will all call him 'The King of the Jews.'"

He didn't come in a plane.
He didn't come in a Jeep.
He didn't come in a pouch
Of a high jumping Voveep.

He rode on the back of a black Sassatoo
Which is the blackiest creature you ever could view.

He rode to Jerusalem -- home of the grumpity Jews
Where false prophets were worshiped -- some even in twos.
There was Murray VonMyrrh and Ghengis Vovooz --
The one you could worship by taking a snooze.

Christ spoke from a mound
Which is a pile of ground.
People gathered around
Without making a sound.

Thus he spake:

"Sin in socks
Socks full of sin.
How do we quiet
This Jehovaty din?
Do unto others as they do unto you.
That includes you, young Timothy Foo."

One pharisee said to another he knew,
"What shall we do with this uppity Jew?"
"Let's wash him in wine and make him all clean
And into Sam Zittle's crucifiction machine."

Twirl the Gawhirl
And release the Galeese
And in go the nails
As fast as you please.

And it is said
That he said as he bled,
"Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do.
For they walk throughout life in toe crampity shoes."

Do you?

Amen.

HO-HUM...

Starburst is good. The green ones and the pink ones, especially. I never liked the red ones.

I'm friggin mad tonight. At various people. For various shit they've done. They know who they are.

Kinda too bitchy to post anything of value. So, instead:

I'm Nobody! Who are you?
Are you a-- Nobody--Too?
Then there's a pair of us!
Don't tell! they'd advertise--you know!

How dreary--to be--Somebody!
How public---like a Frog--
To tell one's name--the livelong June--
To an admiring Bog!
( Emily Dickinson)

Current mood: argh
Current pondering: WHY ARE PEOPLE STUPID!

I AM THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND!!!...

Okay. So the birthday's done. Well, the actual day anyways, since there are still some people who I'd like to celebrate with *throws confetti*

My day couldn't have started off in a better way...with a really sweet phone call..from the Prime Minister!! lol..No no..but it was the one time I actually didn't mind being woken up :)

But then it was off to do the regular birthday things all normal people like myself do on their birthdays...I went to get a needle in my arm and had to wait two hours in a cold metal chair in a small, depressing space. I got my blood work done and went for my doctors appointment. I was imagining those mimes with all the white make-up and striped black-and-white shirts stuck inside invisible boxes. I love those guys...though if I was to see one, I'd probably kick him/her.

But my day did get better. I stopped by Old Navy at Square One to buy a bathing suit and some flip flops and shorts. That put me back in the best freakin' mood cause it just makes you think: It's Summer!!!!!!! Naked toes!! Bare ass!! Sun burn!!! Bug bites!! It's grand!

Anyways, I went to Tuckers with some friends from school...it was nice to see everyone again, since I've either been too busy lately to hang out with people or they have finished school in January or ealrier and moved on. We had some food and drinks and caught up on shit. Here's the update:

Abi's still short.
Marta's hair is red.
Simone is going to Nova Scotia.
Bogdan is doing fine. lol and so is Ilinca.
We don't know what happened to Philly.
Savic's baby is NOT named Collin Collin.

Uhm, if I could remember more, I would share.

Anyways, the reason Tuckers is great is cause they don't check id, give u your dinner free on your bday, and have the gayest little team of people come up, give you a sparkler, clap and sing the HAPPY BIRTHDAY song to you. It was awesome.."It was the best of times..."

hehe...yeah, so after that I was just gonna go home and then go out with Justin, but I was taken hostage into a bar. Well, a bar/restaurant. That Tu Tu Tango place Iza loves with such passion, you'd think it was an ice cream store! They wanted to get me drunk and dancing on the tables for $1 bills...but only succeeded in the first part lol. Okay, that's not true, but they bought me drinks and that was a nice gesture. Thanks guys!

The real drinking began after Tu Tu (lol, that sounds so fruity!) with J. I guess I was a little tipsy by then, and he took my asking for a pink feather boa as a b-day present seriously, and since I already had a silver tiara from Abi which I wore all night, I wore them both to the bar. This morning, he told me that I was yelling at stranger, saying I AM THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND in a high-pitched voice. Appearantly, that got me a free drink. So thats the system, eh!!! Make an ass of yourself for booze. I feel like I am becoming more and more Polish every day...Soon, I'll be back to wearing the tackiest shit on the block (ie. leather pants, jean vests, pink lipstick). Yeaahhh!!

It sucked this morning when I woke up and realized that I didn't know where anything was or that I had not taken a shower. Ewwww. Beer breath.

Needless to say, I had to leave work early today because I was "sick".

And thats pretty much the birthday summary...it wasn't the most interesting of days, but it was gassy lol. Thanks everyone, esp. the designated drivers. That must have sucked for yoU!!! hahahaha...*kidding*..

.......What else is new with me?

Hum, well....I'm not going to Ryerson anymore.

I am now officially a University of Guelph-Humber-er!! And they're giving me money. So that's a lot of stress I don't have to deal with anymore :)

And I'm in the process of signing up for driving school. Not sure that's such a smart idea, but I gotta learn sometime..even if it is at the expense of some innocent pedestrians and/or house pets.

Haven't heard from Ethan besides the missed call on my b-day. I was gonna go to kick boxing tomorrow, but I think I'll go on Friday instead. Honestly, guys, you need to come with me sometime or sign up for something like this on your own. It's the best way to be active, kick some peoples asses in the name of "oops my foot/hand slipped", and meet the craziest people. Both good crazy and psycho crazy, but I'm not your mother so you have to distinguish em yourself.

Been hanging out with J lots lately. Its sweet to have a guy friend so you can have someone to get advice from (from the guys pov) and threaten/beat up all your enemies lol. He says the funniest shit, like "Now go to bed or I'll have to raise my pimp hand" lolol.

Okaaay, Im off to sleep now cause I need to get up tomorrow before work and start my walks with Iza. You know, the ones that are supposed to help you get in shape but you end up taking a detour to the ice cream store..lol

Nite, peoples.

SLEEP? I REMEMBER WHAT THAT WAS LIKE...

So I read somewhere that a person such as myself (age-wise, we all know I'm one-in-a-million lol) should get about 8-9 hours of sleep per night. Ahahha!!! How is that humanly possible? What planet am I living on? (Kay, nobody answer...lol) Anyways, sleeping for that long..wow..I sleep that much in 2-3 nitghts combined. Then I fall asleep during the dumbest times...

(a) while on the bus- this happens ALL THE TIME and then i miss my stop and don't know where i am
(b) in class- which, really, isn't that big of a problem.
(c) while in the doctors waiting room- those couches are so comfy...zzzzzzz...
(d) while showering- happened once!

Kick-boxing was ... interesting ...to say the least. How can somebody just look you in the face and lie through their teeth? Ugh. Honestly, I know I'm Polish, but I have somewhat of a capable mind (don't tell, I'll lose my citizenship!) I punched him once and kicked him in the head, literally. Hopefully, that's the end of that. I'll miss him. I hope he burns in hell...*sigh*...

But on to better things...

Chong is still not saying anything and Jainam has not yet been found. I'm thinking of issuing an award for whoever can locate this kid. But what can I give, since I have no money? Hm. Well, I can draw the person a picture. Of, like, really demented stick people, but it's still something. Or I can sing for them. Some people enjoy pain like that. Hm, OR I can donate Martin. It'lll be like bartering. Oooooh yeaass, excellent, Smithers!!!

So thanks to Dana, I have now used to word "bloody" at least five times today. Thats bloody amazing.

Oh bloody hell.

Where's my bloody tea?

I was on MSN tonight and I got a message from another loser. How do these people find me? Anyway, I thought it would be funny to post some of it. Just cause he's a dumb shit.

Armen says:
so let's do something tonight
coppertone says:
ugh, let's not.
Armen says:
oh...why not?
coppertone says:
cause, you're probably a psycho.
Armen says:
now why would you say that? i am hurt
coppertone says:
lol. are u serious? why? cauuuse...you're some stranger picking up girls online. honestly, that's not normal. kinda creepy
Armen says:
well i met girls bfore. they were nice i still talk to them
coppertone says:
wow that makes all the difference in the world. why didn't u say so in the first place. where do i sign up?
Armen says:
really? :)
coppertone says:
NO!!!!!! argh...where's the block button when u need it
coppertone says:
shit, with all the porn sites out there, id think people like u would have left me alone a long time ago. loser.
Armen says:
what do you look like?
coppertone says:
i have three arms, a deformed foot, a beard, a tail, and the biggest unibrow youve ever seen. u still interestd?
Armen says:
wow, a tail, that's kind of cute. can i pet it? ;)
coppertone says:
*shivers* okay, nite psychopath.

At this point, I deleted him.

Beware of the internet, children!

Okay, it's off to sleep! Im 9 hours short from last night..

current mood: sleepy

CHA-CHING!! not...

It's official. When I go to Rye, I'm gonna go into the admissions office and SLAP somebody.

Okay, so I was just looking around for different contacts to get in touch with about this whole thing, and listening to music. Turns out, I really like the lyrics of Puffy's COME WITH ME...Who would have thought? And I had it on cd all along, just long forgotten.

The selected lines:

Hear my cries,
Hear my call,
Lend me your ears,
See my fall,
See my errors,
Know my faults,
Time halts,
See my loss,
Know I'm lacking,
Backtracking,
Where I met you,
Pistol packing,
Itchy finger,
Trigger happy,
Try to trap me,
Bad rap,
Wiretap me,
Backstab me,
Break the faith,
Fall from grace,
Tell me lies,
Time flies,
Close your eyes,
Come with me.

You said to trust you,
You'd never hurt me,
Now I'm disgusted,
Since then adjusted,
Certainly you fooled me,
Ridiculed me,
Left me hanging,
Now shit's boomerangin',
Right back at ya,
Think long-ranged,
Narrow minded,
Left me blinded,
I co-signed it,
Shit backfired,
Now I'm bouncing back,
I grinded,
Not many would bear the pressure,
You comprehend me,
You musn't end me,
You offend me,
It's trauma,
Feel the drama,
Come with me.


.....blah blah..yadda..yadda...

I ignore you,
Sorry if I bore you,
I neglect you,
Don't mean to disrespect you,
Can't you see
I love you dearly,
And that's sincerely,
But you annoy me,
You can't avoid me,
I'm here to stay,
Forever,
And ever and a day,
That's never,
I can't let you go,
I can't forget it,
Why you did it,
I won't permit it,
I won't acquit it,
I'm gonna to fight you,
I'll fucking' bite you,
Can't stand nobody like you,
You can't run,
You can't hide,
No surprise,
Close your eyes,
Come with me.

I think it's well-constructed, even if you dont think so.....

Anyways, I'm getting ready to go to kick boxing. Well, first I have to make some more calls and clean the kitchen...fuuuun!

Why do they write: "All Purpose Cleaner"? Can I wash myself with it? It looks kinda toxic...

Chong is just sitting there. I haven't talked to him in so long,he's probably planning something evil. Of course, he always has the same expression on his face.

Thanks to Marta and Dana, I saw that guy from Baywatch fly, dance on snow-shoes, hang with aborginals, and sing with an orchestra today. If I wasn't in such a shitty mood, I swear to God I would have falled off of my chair laughing.

He's probably planning to take over the world.

I had my own scheme, once upon a time, but it fell through when the chickens wouldn't put on the nylons. *They're Pinky, Pinky and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain!!..*

Canada Day is coming up!!!! I'm pretty excited. I love...Canadianism...yes, I'm allowed to make up words.

Oh, and Suday is Polish Day!!! ahaha...I know I'll be seeing all of you there! lmao..

I love the smell of sunscreen. It's so summery and reminds you of the sweetest times.

Current mood: anxious
Current music: Whatever, Godsmack.

I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE automated phone services!!!!! Why can't I speak to a real fucking person?? Sucks to you, Rye, OSAP, AFT!! Bastards.

*ahem*...

Current mood: frustrated/pissed off.

GRRRRRR....ARRRGGHH..

1 am. Once again, I find myself unable to sleep so *drumroll* here I am again. Wooo-fucking-hoo! Ugh...

I should be able to sleep now that school is done, but I still have a lot of shit on my mind so I can't.

If there were sheep around, I would count 'em. I wouldn't get far cause I only have...*concentrates...hmm...carry the one*...ten fingers...but it would be worth a try. I hear they also make a yummy lunch, so its a perfect plan.

I need someone to sing me a song. hehe...How about that POlish one? WLAZ KOTEK NA PLOTEK I MRUGA! Come on..you know you know the words...whats better than singing a little child to sleep with a song about a cat on a fence? That 's up there with the many wonderful things Polaks have contributed to society.

I dread can't wait until Friday!!!

Another thing I hate is living so near the airport. I have what is probably the biggest phobia of planes on the entire planet and now, lucky me, I get to have them flying over my head ALL THE TIME. Here's another Polish one: PANIE PILOCIE! DZIURA W SAMOLOCIE!!

It fucking hurts so much.

I've decided not to do anything big for my birthday. My reasons are the following:

(1) I do NOT have the energy to plan.
(2) I'm broke.
(3) I really don't care about so many people who I would have originally liked to invite.

And another thing: GRADE TWELVES! Dear God, the dumb fucks those kids are. THEY'RE going to uni next year? Argh.....that's an encouraging thought.

Today, I was walking down the little raper-forest and this dumb-assed grade tweve kid (let's call him Unibrow) and some (of course!) slut were walking in front of me, talking about how high they are for their exam as if its some big fucking deal. You're a loser. Wow. Congrats. I swear, grade twelves are so insignificant. They're so small to me, I feel like I should/can just squish them all with the bottom of my shoe. You're an ugly crackhead? GOOD FOR YOU!!!! Fuck, don't people have any other accomplishments to be proud of?

I know you are, but what am I?

Uhm, okay, so mostly bitchy post but HELL I deserve one once in a while. I'm just a big fcking ray of sunshine tonight, aren't I?

SOHUM...

I am *officially* done High School for the rest of my life!!!!!!!! *sings* No more papers, no more books, no more teachers' dirty looks!

Ahm, but I WILL miss the place. I mean, when will I ever get to wear that sexy & stylish blue cardigan again?! Or those gray slacks..oh, how I'll miss you. And it will be such a change for me to finally be able to use toilet paper and have real, actual SOAP to wash my hands with. Goodbye, days of dirty locker that won't open, and Mrs. Clark's masculine voice hunting me down. No more watered-down pasta or 3-month old butter tarts. Or the long-assed time that it took me to get there. I'll miss that the most...*sniff*...

I'm at Iza's house right now cause I don't have enough time to get home and back to work on time. She's painting something and her sister (who owes me pizza!!) made cookies. Needles to say, if I die of food poisoning anytime soon, you know where to point fingers. I'm on the computer, about to go eat some sausage and get outside for a while..(the weather is ACTUALLY getting sunny!!!)...and then it's off to work! Va va va voom!

*immitates Tom Green's song* Kasia would you like some sausage? Kasia would you like some sausage?

There is a picture here of Iza and Krystina a few years ago...in some sort of store. They are both wearing funky sombreros, or are they cowboy hats? Either way, they're pretty hilarious. Iza is wearing a frilly shirt with a tied ribbon at the top and socks with lace. K is wearing pink flood pants. It's sad, because I have the same ones in neon green. *blushes*...I mean, HAD! HAD! *nervous chuckle*

Life is like a box of shit.

Yeah, so a loud explosion sound just came from the backyard and Iza came in with a pair of pliers attached to a burnt match, yelling "WHOA! THAT WAS AN ADVENTURE!". She's making our BBQ. Yes, people. You gotta love eezah. Visit her blog @ http://izfo.blogspot.com

Okay guys, before this girl burns off a body part, I'm gonna go and enjoy the afternoon sun and eat some dog..*heh*..I mean, pig. We're SO having pork..uh uh...

PINKY! ARE U PONDERING WHAT I'M PONDERING?...

So, hm, I was called a feminist today. I'm not *really* a feminist, guys, I'm just EXTREMELY anti-male..lol..that has nothing to do with feminism, really, which centers around the wiser, higher, and way more significant gender. Kidding! (wink wink)...It's not that I hate ALL guys. But you gotta admit that most of you ARE assholes. I can think of a select few that aren't...though that requires effort...but then again, girls can be that way also...so, in a sense, we're all assholes. That's a good thought to live by..lol.

Okay, no. SOME guys are real angels. Like, three or four.

But then, I was reading over Freud's theory on women (yes, I'm a gigantor nerd) and about his concept of penis envy. Like, hi, I'm supposed to be ashamed becasue I don't have one? Cause I actually have another organ I can think with? Argghhmm...Hi. My name is Kasia and I have no penis. I'm merely a woman and I should spend my lifetime weaving baskets (Freud, 139) and cooking and cleaning for my hunky bread-winner husband. Fucker, give me a break...

Anyways, I just wanted to make the point clear: I am NOT a feminist.

Excellent, Smithers, Excellent!!

My last exam is tomorrow...yay. Its late though and I still need to study....argh. I wish I could have an exam on apples. Why doesn't anyone test me on apples? They did it in ESL. I remember it clearly. Grade four. Mrs.Black's class. We learned allllll about apples. We even went on a field trip outside the school and we picked some apples and we made our very own apple sauce...This is why I speak English the way that I do. We spent ESL making apple sauce.

Why do people say, "I'd do anything for you"????????? Hmmm, ANYTHING? Really? Would you kiss a horse? Risk your life climbing up a steep mountain? Eat chicken intestine? Jump rooftops? Lay an egg? Or, would you at least be honest with me? Fucker, you wouldn't. So don't tell me that you would.

Jainam Gor, still amused.

Time to go to sleep. Sleep now. Study later. Heh heh heh...

JAINAM GOR....

Guys, if anybody knows who Jainam Gor is, please tell him to contact me...lol...My brother found this school id of a little kid named Jainam Gore with his name and picture on a piece of red construction paper, laminated. He gave it to me as what I assume to be my birthday present, saying, "Here. I found this on the floor. I thought you'd like it." And you know what? I LOVE IT!! I feel like I've written one of those adoption agencies and now I have adopted my very own Jainam Gore. Except that I won't be giving anybody any money, and he doesnt really know I exist, and he won't be sending me any cards with lots of yellow happy faces! Still, it's pretty special *tear*

Well, the application thing was sorted out. I mean, they got it so *perhaps* I do have some sort of a future after all. Still, feel free to drop of canned goods. I'm all about the Chef Boyardee. My new dilemma is the scholarship situation. I DID NOT work my ass off (like, NO sleep, NO fun, NO social life) to not get my friggin $3000. Gonna call admissions people AGAIN today and threaten them with my singing of COPA COBANA. Watch out!!

And yeah, I'm not in a great mood cause I had to wake up early today (9am) and study for an exam which I don't even know is worth it since I may not be getting a scholarship anyway. But enough of bitching about that...for now...

We were supposed to go waxing today but now it seems that we're not hairy and you're supposed to be. Just thought I would share.

OOOHHHH my motto for after June:

Last year I abstained
this year I devour
without guilt
which is also an art

And NO, not like THAT, you pervs.

I'm really sad today. For reasons I'd rather not post. Justin tells me its better to keep it all bottled up inside anyways lmao.

Please please please, if you're looking for a place to crank call, call (416) 979-5027. Stupid office of admissions!

Okay, I'm done. Toddles.

WHEN THE MOON HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE, THAT'S AMORE!!!

Hum, it turns out that I may not be going to university next year. Cause I didnt get the definition of "express mail". Well, I did, but I was busy. Oh well.....guys, be sure to stop off at my cardboard box once in a while to say hi. Drop off a can of beans. Tell me stories. Bring me blankets. I'll be the one holding up the "Will write for food" sign.

Okay, perhaps a bit overwhelmed...

One week until I'm nineteen. The big 1-9. Ew, I'm old. Is that a wrinkle?

No, I will NOT participate.

The jehovah witnesses came by my house today asking for me by NAME as if we were best of f'n friends or something. Or like they've been stalking and/or going through my trash. Should I be concerned? WWJD? lol

I found the funniest pictures of the French Family (like, Erna and I before the last skit...me in robe and erna as boy) muahaha....but I dunno how to post them on here. I'm computer dumb. Hell, I'm Polish....we still use those beads on a stick to count.

I love hate you so much.

I'm drinking Calgarian water.

The Mississauga Library called me today. Turns out I owe them money again. Currently, I have six books overdue but I can only locate five. My dog ate it?

I see you baby, shakin' that ass...

Friggin' Amanda girl on Muchmusic is sooooo annoying!!!!

He left himself on my doorstep,
abandoned in the shabby
basket of his own ribs.
(Atwood, 50)

Ok. So I admit it. I LOVED those green shorts....

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me. Please...

Current music: a bunch of old stuff from a burned cd
Current mood: bored/unwilling to study
Current dilemma: application at OUAC

MALY KRASNOLUDEK....

Turns out I know so many two-faced people. Yaaaaaay!!! *groans*

So The Mother stopped by and asked my when we were getting married. Little does she know, we're already *divorced* Still, there's something very cute/comical about an older Italian lady trying to hop the counter to squeeze your cheeks...She bought Nair.

Charging...charging...78% complete....zzzzzzzzz....

Fat boy! I wanna make you smileeee!!

Oh, also I saw GinoBoy (Copyrights Kasia, 1999) today. He looked good. As always. He reminded me of the days of yore. I wanted to kick him in the head. I didn't try.

I've come to the conclusion that I care way too much about people who don't give a shit in return.

But on a brighter note, Sponge Bob replied to my e-mail!!! It's like writing freakin' Santa Clause!! :)

Current mood: pissed off/bitchy
Current music: Barry White

WARM DAYS AHEAD... :)

The state of being productive: yielding results, benefits, or profits.

The state of being non-productive: MEEEEEEH!!!! :)

Uhm, shopped and hung out with pasta-sauce obsessed people...heh...I had an awesome time.

it was like Christmasss.....!

Current mood: Happy :)
Current music: Guilia...hehe..i'm in a gino mood

SUPER BANANAS!!...

...*yawn*...shoulders falling, ears itchin, tired, allergic, done.

teehee...YOUR PROBLEM....

Nothing interesting happened today. I was *supposed* to get some sleep, but I didn't. I was *supposed* to go see Butt Face, but I didn't. I was *supposed* to build a pyramid, but I didn't. I was *supposed* to learn my alphabet, but I didn't. I was *supposed* to turn into a responsible "grown-up, mature, and intelligent" human being...but instead, I ate tacos.

..haha...I had an R.Kelly song stuck in my head allllll day today (that I Can't Sleep or whatever its called)..HA! R.Kelly! I feel gulty and/or dirty listening to his music now..like every time he says "baby", I think he means it literally. *spppooookkky*

And New Jersey won the Stanley Cup a few nights ago. Argh!! Fuckers...

Argh.

Current mood: nutty/angry/pleased.
Current music: Blackstreet, Don't Leave.

Tarzan!
Swinging from a rubber band
Crashed into a frying pan
Now Tarzan has a tan

HUMM...

Well, school finally over. Well, the class part at least. Two exams left and then I'm freeeeeeeeeeeee!

The Old Polish Woman shit actually went okay...I laughed, I cried, but mostly I just acted like an immigrant.

Coffee at night is not a good idea...

BASTARD. What a BASTARD.

Anyway, Iza taught me the coolest song:

If I Had a little white box, that I'd keep Jesus in, I'd take him out and *muah muah muah*, and share him with a friend.
If I had a little black box, that I'd keep Satan in, I'd take him out and BASH HIS HEAD, and put him back again.

*Muahahahahahahaaaaaa!*

current mood: indifferent.
days until i'm freeeEEEeeeeee!: 7

BLAH BLAH BLAH...

I look at this coke
And the truth is obvious
I don't know the percentage
No accurate statistics
But I know it's been watered
Maybe 1 to 5
Maybe worse
It's not even dark anymore
It's the color of your eyes.
Watered down
Like many things between us
Faded
Flavourless
The waitress does it every time
Same old redundant bullshit
She smiles slyly
We're such idiots, she must think
We don't know the difference
One of us does.

Current mood: BLAH

THE FOLLOWING THINGS I LOOOVE:

The Muffin Man
Sleeping in
Having the time of day
Secrets
Candy
Makin fun of dumb shits
The words "dumb shit"
Polish jokes
Weirdos
"I've got mail. Yaaaaay!"
Funny phone calls
Coolers
The sound of the rain
Compliments
Getting away with it.
Constructive criticism
The store price
The Leafs
The beach
Leaf fans
The colour red
Ant-Americanism
Tulips
Butter tarts
Camping
Crazy glue
Details
Perfume
My Babcias
Christmas
Tea
Silver
Silliness w/a limit
Shots
Cheap, cute gifts as oppsed to expensive ones
The Simpsons
Long weekends
Loyalty
Cartoons
Being respected
Eyebrow piercings
Spontaneity
Bubble baths
Spending money
Creativity
Showing it, not saying it.
Winning
Playgrounds
Night time
Brutal honesty
Real friends
Being comfortable
Revenge
Tim Horton's
Lip gloss

...AND THE FOLLOWING THINGS I HATE WITH A PASSION:

Liars
Psychos
Lack of sleep
Mondays
Lactose-free food
School
Blame
Sluts
Driving
Peanuts
Avril what's-her-face
Being sick
Being underage
Food Basics
Nosey people
Cold weather
Eisenburg
Hypocrisy
Restrictions
People who say "bling bling"
People who call themselves "the shit"
*Friends* who only call u when they need something
Cranberries
Bacon
Lots of make-up
Confession
Nasty caf food
Discrimination
Fuckers
Cats
Trash TV
Green
Uniform
Not having the guts.
People at bus stops
Boy bands
Gold
Perverts
Smoking
Chats
The Oscars
Sappiness
Wanting to, but not being allowed.
Forgiveness
Crying
Misconceptions
Conformity
Beer
Arrogance

YEE HAW...

It's not that I don't *like* country music....it's just that I would rather honestly be stomped on by a herd of wild mating elephants.....I don't know why they were blasting it so loud today...*shivers*..."My cow's got mad cow disease and now i can't eat no beef with my beans"..that kinda bullshit...it makes me want to rip all my hair out.

I HATE Sean Paul. Sean Paul is the spawn of satan.

And let's *suppose* that I *did* walk into the guy's washroom by *accident* because I *really really* had to goooo...does that make me a bad person?

Biting into a NyQuil caplet is not a good idea...ewwwww...

Total number of people I've thrown up on since last thursday: 2

But FINALLY somebody brought me candy!!!!!! :)

Practiced being Crazy Polish Mother today...not doing such a great job...need a thicker accent and more anger...the babuska scarf kicks ass though..it's all about the scarf people...

Water water water...tinkle tinkle tinkle

I was in bed most of the day again (yaaaaay!!!!! that's so fun..*argh*) and I was watching Sponge Bob. Damn, he's so cool. I love him. What's funnier than a talking sponge named BoB?..Will you marry me Sponge Bob?

Be gone, school, be gone!

Mission in life: Find lactose-free whipped cream.
Current mood: stressed out
Current music: Eminem

I ATE ROSUL AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS T-SHIRT...

DayQuil: $10.98
Advil tablets: $4.98
Noodles for the rosul: $2.99
A box of Kleenex with Sponge Bob on the front: $1.98
Working all day, trying not to pass out: Pricless!

Why is it that you always get sick at the worst times?

Do you know the Muffin Man???!?!?!?!?!??!!?!?!

You know what's fun? When you cough on the bus, and everyone thinks you have friggin' SARS so you get the whole back of the bus to stretch out and use up all the seats..teehee..dumbasses.

Guys, Billy Jean is NOT my lover.

Current mood: exhausted
Current music: No Doubt-Underneath it all (i miss those days)
Countdown till I can burn my books: 11 days
Countdown till the Leafs win the Stanley Cup: (insert cuss words here)

THE RAMBLINGS OF A SICK POLACK...(yes, in more ways than one)...

Humm...have u ever wondered why a spoon is round and a fork is pointy?
Neither have I..*nervous chuckle*..
Today is my first official day of no school & no work in, like, forever..
And..*drumroll*..I'm SICK!..
Sniffle, sniffle...
So is THIS what people do when they're sick?
It's so sunny outside..if I wasn't so lazy, I'd open the window and
listen to the birds chirping
Or the sound of construction..
I threw up on Justin yesterday.
What's the meaning of "glycerine-silicone-camomile"?
je ne parle pas francais..
Sniffle, sniffle...
Cough, cough...
If I were a superhero, I would steal Bob Barker's job
And wear a red cape
And make everyone call me "Master"
And give everyone a personal midget slave
And wipe mathematics off the face of the planet
And learn Yiddish
And on the seventh day, I would rest.
Sniffle, sniffle...
Cough, cough...
I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts.
There they are all standin' in a row
Big ones
Small ones
Small as big as your head

Current mood: sniffly
Current music: the coconut song
Countdown till i don't need no education: 12 days
Countdown till my barfday: much longer.